If your idea of me time translates into a solo clubbing session, give yourself a pat on the back. Alleviating the heebie-jeebies of being alone on the dancefloor is no easy feat. But the liberating feeling that washes over at the realization that you won’t get dragged in the smoking area tonight is worth it.
You might be a veteran in the rolling alone world. You might make your grand debut on the solo clubbing scene next weekend. Or you might want to exorcize your introverted demons tonight.
Either way, here are the solo clubbing tips you should have up your sleeve when “just one” is the answer to the bouncer’s ubiquitous “How many?”.
1. Bond with new people – and bail out on them whenever you want
Are you going to see these people ever again? No. Will you remember their names tomorrow morning? Also no.
But did you have a blast? Yes, you did.
Solo clubbing is like a chocolate surprise egg – you never know what you’ll get. Maybe you will find your new clubbing bestie in the bar queue.
Or perhaps you are doomed to end up with your head above the toilet, swearing to God you’ll never do tequila shots again while your new pals knock on the door, asking if you need someone to hold your hair.
When you’re out clubbing solo, one tip is to bond as much as you can.
All you need to initiate this platonic version of the one-night stand is “Have you got a Rizla?” or “Your outfit looks bomb.”
Yet the most tantalizing aspect of this impromptu road gig is the freedom to drift from one group to another – it’s all about the mellow flexibility.
If you want to change the dancefloor or the conversation urges you to roll your third eye, all you have to do is dash. There are no strings attached, so you owe no explanation for your vanishing spell.
2. Prepare your pockets
Be self-reliant. It’s part of becoming a full-time adult – it’s like settling down in university dorms and having to discover how the oven works by yourself.
You might not be a devotee of the “carrying a nightlife essentials arsenal” cult, but the only person who will have your back tonight is the one you’re looking at in the mirror.
While bumming a cigarette off a smoking area shenanigan is on the cards, imagine having to head back home with no battery, cash, and the bitter remembrance of leaving your cardholder on the kitchen counter.
You took a break from the pack, so nobody will be nice enough to give you $20 for an Uber and you can’t count on the mum of the group to lend you a phone charger anymore.
Stuff your pockets with a clubbing first aid kit: cigarettes, cash, gum, cards, and anything you’d picture yourself asking around for in a couple of hours. Be the momma of the whole group – the group being you. That’s what adults do.
3. Your safety is your number one priority
The dance floor isn’t as safe as it should be. Drink spiking is on the rise and clubbing solo makes you an easy target for pick-up artists – not to mention that weirdo performing his squid-having-a-stroke dance routine two centimetres away from you as a way to flirt.
Ladies, this solo clubbing tip is not only for you. According to a report, one in five spiking victims are men. While guys might not get drugged for the same reasons as women, they can fall prey to robbers. The last thing you want after a roofies-induced black out that is a mini heart attack from not feeling your phone in your pocket.
Let your friends know where you are by sending your live location – sounds stalkerish, but it’s better to be safe than sorry. Watch your drink and keep it covered with your palm. Don’t take drugs from the guy whose product presentation only demonstrated that he doesn’t know what he is selling. Make sure you’re safe and sound at every step and dance move you make.
If you can’t get away from someone who is a pro at sending bad vibes, then ask for Angela at the bar. It’s not a beautifully-layered boozy concoction, but UK’s nightlife safety scheme Ask for Angela.
Using the codeword will make the staff understand you’re in a precarious situation, and they will give you discreet help.
4. It’s all about you, you and you
Forget about the days when compromising to a post-terrorcore death rave was the only way to cling to the weekend’s seventh heaven.
Solo clubbing might be the only shot at designing your fool proof out-and-about vision from A to Z.
Be selfish. Alleviate the pressure of the give-and-take group chat tradition when planning the next clubbing session. Pick the event you want to go to.
Get to the party when you feel like it. Last – but far from being the least – leave when your feet are sore and your bank account is sobbing, not when the group’s party pooper wants to sack off the night.
When you’re clubbing solo, the world’s your oyster and the possibilities are endless.
Your nomadic experience on the dancefloor might be the only time when the lusted-after adrenaline kick meets your unapologetic freedom – so make sure you’re doing it right.